We all know that “Money can’t buy happiness,” and when we’ve had a brush with disaster and possibly experienced some financial impact as well, we often say, “Thank God it’s only money, and “Thank God that no one was hurt. That’s the important thing.” And, I think most of us would agree that money is not as important as the people in our lives and that we know plenty of people with lots of money who are not happy. Having lots of money does not necessarily equate with happiness. There is plenty of data to suggest that, once our basic needs are met, as in shelter, food, basic comfort, an increase in wealth does not necessarily result in increased happiness.
Yet, nearly everyone that I have coached and many people in the Law of Attraction forums would say that a lack of financial abundance is one of the major obstacles they are facing in their current circumstances. We tend to make quite a big deal about this, and unnecessarily so. It’s just that we’ve had lots of training in our lives to have a funny relationship with money. We want it, and yet we know it won’t solve all of our problems or create instant happiness. And most of us have gotten very mixed signals from well meaning parents, teachers and perhaps our spiritual or religious group, that not only is money really difficult to come by but, that having too much money is not okay. It’s really no wonder that we self-sabotage when it comes to money.
Ideas that might not be serving you: Money doesn’t grow on trees; I don’t absolutely need that; People with lots of money are usually selfish; If you have more money than you need, you’re taking that away from someone else; It’s just not right to live well when other people are starving and homeless. Yada yada.
While most of us have come to understand that all of the statements above are false and limiting beliefs about money, we sometimes don’t know that we’re carrying vestiges of those beliefs somewhere way down there, and it’s often affecting the flow of money into and out of our lives.
So, are there any true and uplifting beliefs about money that might replace those limiting beliefs?
Ideas that might serve you:
Having money in our world equals freedom and the purpose of our life is freedom; Having money allows us to be generous with others; If God or Source Energy is expressing through us, having money, which allows us the freedom to do what we really want, is allowing God to express more fully through us; Worrying about money waters down our vibration and takes up much of our creativity and power; Financial freedom allows us to be fully present for our unique purpose in this life; we can show up in a bigger way.
I don’t know about you, but the statements above appeal to me in a big way and ring absolutely true. I understand now that money is just energy, like everything else, and that having financial abundance and freedom is on our path to living a full life and contributing in our own unique way to our world.
There is lots of wisdom out there on tuning your vibration to the bandwidth of financial abundance. There are affirmations, prosperity games, exercises for feeling like you have money before you have money. And, these can work amazingly well, for some people. I’m all in for using some of the great processes that are out there for allowing in your financial abundance. I use some of them myself and with clients and they sometimes work. I have found, however, that our underlying beliefs about money are the biggest indicator of whether money is going to flow freely into our lives.
Changing your mindset about money, your “Inner Game,” should be Step One in creating more abundance in your life, in general (that’s why “Inner Game” forms part of the name of my coaching platform). In fact, you may not even need a Step 2, or any more steps, if you can master your Inner Game when it comes to money. How might you change your Inner Game and let go of some false beliefs you may be carrying unknowingly when it comes to money?
- Respect money. Money is attracted to respect and appreciation. Marie Forleo of MarieTV, who shares wisdom on money and other hot topics, says that she began to turn around her dismal financial situation when she began to respect her money by not saying no to honest money and respecting things like loose change or found money on the sidewalk. She also insists upon keeping her money “tidy and organized.” For her this means all of her dollars are flat in her wallet, ones with ones, fives with fives, tens with tens, in a neat pile.
- Change your money set point. Have you noticed that you expect to look at your bank balance on your phone or computer and see it generally around a certain amount, rarely going above it? I was doing that until I thought, “What’s up with that? Why am I programming myself to have a set point of a certain number of dollars that I rarely rise above? Before you check your bank balance and when you think about your bank balance, take a moment to envision a somewhat higher balance, that’s beyond where you’ve been in recent months but also seems possible to you. Your balance is likely to begin to rise to meet your changed expectations.
- Don’t expect someone else to be the source of your supply. I love this limiting belief unearthed by the financial writer, Kate Northrup, that is, that “Someone else should or will do this for me.” This is such a powerful false belief to uncover. And, it’s certainly easy to have picked that up along the way, whether expecting a spouse, parents, or a potential inheritance to solve your money issues for you. Not only is this a limiting belief about money, but it’s a limiting belief in terms of your personal power. Enough said.
- Change your confidence level when it comes to handling money. Have you ever thought, “I’m just not good with money”? I think that this defeating belief can come from two different angles. You may think you’ve been “bad” with money by overspending, accruing debt or not managing what you have very well. You might also think about having a lot more money at some future date and think “I don’t know how to manage lots of money,” and actually be allowing some fear to block the flow of money. To counter the first notion that you may have managed your money poorly in the past, you might remember that your circumstances were different then. You’re circumstances have changed and so have you. You can’t go backwards now that you know how energy works and that money is just like any kind of energy. That self-sabotage is just counterproductive and irrelevant. Similarly, fearing that you would not be good with lots of money (like those lottery winners who end up penniless in a few years) is based on an unfounded belief about your relationship with money. In any area of your life, learning to drive, learning to ride a bike, learning to be a good parent, you took the steps you needed to become competent. You may not have learned those money skills yet, but why wouldn’t you be good at that? And, aren’t there lots of people out there more than willing to help you with managing lots of money? End of discussion.
- Pay attention to your money. Don’t let fear cause you to leave unopened bills sitting on your desk or scare you into not checking your bank balance. When you’ve developed fear around money, you need to take small actions to rebuild your confidence. Kate Northrop recommends checking your bank balance daily. Instead of feeling fear when you look at your bank balance, she suggests thinking of three things in your life that make you feel abundant each time you check your balance. Train yourself to associate your bank balance with abundance instead of fear.
- Feel confident in asking for what you’re worth from those with whom you exchange money. It’s not greedy or nonspiritual; you are just trading your valuable expertise for value. You are helping others in those exchanges. It’s more than okay to prosper from providing advice, assistance and filling a need for others.
- Build your feeling of worthiness when it comes to money. Do you sometimes hear a voice suggesting that you’re not smart or competent enough to get a high value in exchange for your service to others, that you haven’t done enough to have an abundant life? This is all about worthiness, which we know affects everything we Allow into our lives. It’s been suggested that you build your feelings of worthiness by writing in a journal for 21 days listing three things you value about yourself or three ways you’ve added value to someone else’s life. And, this doesn’t need to be in the form of a monetary exchange, just value, in general. Developing a feeling of worthiness may be your most important step in changing your Inner Game when it comes to money.
I also have lots of tools and exercises for helping you to change your mindset with respect to money and Allowing it into your life freely. I’d like to suggest beginning by following the simple steps above to change your “Inner Game,” as an easy and necessary platform for using your full power to create the abundance you deserve in your life. As we all know, abundance isn’t just about money and money is only energy. Creating an easy flow of money into your life is going to create much more than financial abundance for you. Creating financial abundance is just an important foundation for creating the freedom that allows you to live an abundant life, in general. You deserve it.