While I’m on sabbatical, which is soon coming to a close, I’m posting some blogs that resonated with lots of readers or were personal favorites. In the time since this was originally posted I’ve had even more amazing examples of the value of this approach. So, consider this tried and true advice. As always, wishing you the best and expect things to get better and better because now you know how things really work.
I’ve had a recent epiphany when it comes to deliberate creation of both big and small things. This shouldn’t be a huge revelation to either me or many other deliberate creators, but sometimes you get it, and sometimes you “GET IT.” At least that’s the way this seems to work for me. I know how all of this works and I’m successful at it quite a bit of the time. And, then something happens and there is a whole new layer exposed that hadn’t really been top of mind before.
I was having lunch with one of my friends and I remember mentioning that lots of things, smaller things which need to be taken care of, are seeming like a big deal, a big hassle on the surface. And, more and more I’m finding that they really were easily taken care of, almost as if the solution was pre-wired before I got involved in any efforts to take care of the issue. And, then my very smart daughter, using a bit of “tough love,” suggested that I do something which sounded very hard to put into practice in real life. And, while I know she loves me dearly, only wants to be helpful and only cares about my happiness, I found myself thinking, “well, she doesn’t realize it’s not as easy as she thinks.” She’s only 25 and she has doesn’t realize how hard that can be. And, then it hit me. Of course, she was right. It’s only as hard or as easy as I think it is.
Everything is as easy or as hard as we think it’s going to be. And, we often don’t notice when we’re going through our day how we’re approaching tasks, issues, problems, or things that just need to be addressed one way or the other. And, then I started going through in my head so many of the routine things that have come up over the last several weeks, and I realized that everything is getting easier because, mostly, I’m not giving much air time at all to “ugh, this is going to be such a hassle.” I don’t even think I’m giving it 17 seconds. I’m just moving on and thinking, I’ll take care of this when I’m in an unstoppable mood. And, when I’m in that place of connection, then it’s as if the clouds part and everyone I’m dealing with is seriously trying to help me. And, the issue is resolved and it came out nothing like it appeared it might at first blush. In other words, it wasn’t the “big hairy deal we make it out to be,” as Abraham is fond of saying.
In a very minor example, I received a snarky, yeah definitely snarky if you can detect snarky in writing, e-mail from my auto insurance company indicating that one of our cars was registered in my daughter’s name, although it was on our policy. Well, duh, of course it is, it’s her car. My son’s car is also registered in his name. You’re allowed to have a family policy. It makes sense while kids are in college and getting their first jobs and they don’t even have their cars with them. He indicated that he needed proof within 46 hours by fax, that we are at least co-owners of my daughter’s car.
I started to go down the path of “what a hassle. In order to put our name on the title, we’ll have to get the title to her in NYC and possibly have it notarized and then I’ll have to have it sent back here and then take it to the MVA in Maryland . . . and on and on. And, you don’t want to have to go to the MVA in Maryland or any other state,” but I didn’t go on and on and on. I just stopped thinking about it. I thought this is ridiculous. I’ll call them when I’m feeling unstoppable. And, I’m going to ignore the 46 hour deadline. Well, I called them and got a lovely person on the line who let me know that the reason there was a problem was that my daughter’s name had somehow been removed from our policy. It took about two seconds to put her name back on the policy and, problem solved. The entire e-mail was misleading in terms of what was going to be required. And, I was thinking, I’m so glad this was so easy, definitely easier than I initially thought it would be.
I won’t bore you with the plethora of potential administrative nightmares that were resolved quickly, easily and in my favor, but that’s the way things have been going. And, I think it’s a result of things being as easy as I think they will be. I might start off with, “ugh, oh no, are you kidding me?,” but then I remember that I have an entourage of helpers who are working on my problems before they even become evident to me as problems. I have my intuition which is definitely becoming more finely honed and which leads me to discover solutions before the issue has become a “big hairy deal.” In fact, we were visiting my mother and stepfather this weekend (who is quite sick with Parkinson’s disease) and took lunch to them to try to boost morale. Despite it being a short visit and the temperature being in the mid-90’s, something called to me to walk outside onto their backyard deck. It was just a feeling, sort of like sleep-walking. Well, as soon as I got outside I heard a hissing, running sound and noticed that there was a huge pool of water pretty far out in their yard. I called my Mom to ask if she meant to leave the hose running and we realized that it actually was a huge leak where a pipe had become disconnected beneath their deck. We were able to find a water shut off valve until she could get someone to repair it. And, luckily the valve didn’t affect any of the other water in the house. So, the whole thing was no big deal. And, I said a silent thank you to whoever whispered in my ear to take that stroll outside.
So, I’m committed to having a greater awareness of how I’m viewing things, the big and small things that arise in a day. Am I thinking, “no problem, things seem to take care of themselves pretty well, or jeez, this is going to be a huge hassle, just what I need right now and on and on and on?”
I love this discovery and I can truly affirm that life is getting easier because, when everything is looked at in this way, it must get easier. It’s just the way the laws work. I think the next post will need to address applying this unstoppable attitude to the “big things.” In the meantime, try to catch yourself when you think about a chore, a task, an assignment, a repair, a job that needs attention. It’s going to be as easy as you think it is.