In our last post we talked about self-appreciation and whether we often judge ourselves for things we think we should have done or should not have done, or, at the least, should have known better. And, if we are judging ourselves for what we think of as missteps, what we believe about ourselves becomes the truth for us. Take a minute to ponder that because it actually is a really important aspect of creating the life you want. I’ll say it again, as I need to hear it as much as anyone. What we believe about ourselves becomes the truth for us.
In my last post, I mentioned that Louise Hay, in her book, “You Can Heal Your Life,” found that the “innermost belief for everyone I have worked with is always, “I’m Not Good Enough.” She suggests that if you’re finding yourself saying you’re not good enough, ask but for whom, and according to whose standards? It is her view, and I concur, that there is no way we should be judging ourselves for anyone else. And, who sets these so called standards by which we might judge ourselves? These are the same kinds of standards that make us feel unworthy, that we haven’t done enough, should’ve done more, should be doing more, or are lagging behind in accordance with some arbitrary measuring post.
The problem with comparing ourselves and judging ourselves is that we have all come to this earth with our own unique agendas. Some of us may have even set up some circumstances to be a little more difficult this time around because we want to develop a particular aspect of ourselves in this lifetime. Yeah, I know, this is when my friend and I say to each other, “What the hell were we thinking?” Seriously, sometimes the hurdles seem a little too huge. The contrast seems a bit too dramatic, even for those of us who like a little drama, and the lack of what we want seems to be getting more air time than the solution and the manifestation of what we want so badly.
Louise Hay says that self-approval and self-acceptance in the now are the main keys to positive changes in every area of our lives. She calls that kind of Love the “miracle cure.” And I’m inclined to agree and suggest that we all put more emphasis on self-appreciation, even as we use other tools to create what we want in our lives.
When you think about it, if there is a “grid,” which is filling in with the details of our desires and our thoughts and beliefs, the way we think of ourselves would naturally find its way into every particle of that grid. It is our vibration. Can you imagine it any other way? Could we have a great money vibe or relationship vibe when we have problems with self-worth and self-love? Wouldn’t the feelings of low self worth cloud our money vibe so that we didn’t attract the money we are really “worth?” And, as for relationships, we can only attract the relationships we think we deserve, that we’re worthy of. Without self-love and appreciation, our relationship vibe would necessarily be attracting somebody who didn’t bring a lot to the table, someone whose self-worth matched our own.
I, for one, am glad that this topic came to the forefront for me. I’ve been getting those internal nudges and whispers and feelings from those friends in high places, that I just have to focus on self-appreciation and send that message out to others as well.
So, if on the scale of self-appreciation, you rate less that a 10 plus, it would be worth giving this topic some extra time. I’m not one for dredging up and re-hashing something someone said to you ten years ago that affected your beliefs about your own worthiness. I believe in a quick look, and then a decision to ignore whatever that ignoramus said or did and let that be the end of it. I recommend a quick look at why their view of us might have affected how we think of ourselves now and then an equally quick release of that bogus belief. Why should they affect the quality of your life in any way now, especially now that you know that you create your life with the thoughts you think, even those ridiculous and false beliefs about yourself? And, then it’s always wise to forgive yourself as well for allowing that undermining belief to occupy space in your head for as long as it has. Remember that we’ve all been doing the best that we can from where we’ve evolved to at any particular juncture. If anyone could’ve done better, they would have, including you and me.
How can we appreciate ourselves more? Could you actually remind yourself that you like yourself, even love yourself, as often as possible? One suggestion has been to imagine yourself as a 4-year-old child and how you would lovingly speak to them and give them a hug instead of belittling them, which you might do to your adult self. You could use that technique for yourself and for others who need to be forgiven in your life. It’s hard to be resentful when you imagine anyone as an innocent four-year-old child.
By embarking on this life journey, we courageously opened ourselves up to encountering huge challenges and occasionally stumbling or even wiping out completely. I think we’ve all been there. It would serve us all very well to think about what we actually believe about ourselves. And, it would be a good idea to purge from our thoughts any beliefs that are based on some impossible standard of perfection or comparison to others. Remember that beliefs are just thoughts we keep thinking. Don’t give them any more power than that. I think a list of our own positive aspects is in order. And, I would look at it often, especially if we find ourselves doubting our value and our worthiness of the good things in life. Let’s remember ourselves as the very worthy and courageous beings that we are, and know that Source desires for us to have anything and everything we want. And, there is no room for doubt about our own worthiness in that scenario.
So, the next time you pass by a mirror, look into your own eyes and remind yourself that you deserve love and appreciation from yourself and others. It wouldn’t hurt to actually tell yourself out loud that you love and appreciate yourself, (might want to keep the volume down on that one, though, or you could have more annoying people to contend with).
I would predict a huge inflow of things you’ve been waiting for once you become kind to yourself and begin to love and appreciate yourself for the worthy being that you are. Just remember that your beliefs about yourself determine whether you manifest all of your most wanted creations. And you deserve every one of them.
If you’d like some help with uncovering false beliefs and releasing them or with ramping up your self-appreciation, don’t hesitate to contact me at [email protected]
“How to Allow,” the course and e-book, which is helping so many people, can be found at www.howtoallow.net.