It’s really easy to feel stuck when we keep doing the same things, the same way, with the same people, with the same expectations. How do we actually think we’re going to Allow the changes we want into our lives if we keep telling the same story about how we got here and repeating the same behaviors over and over? And, it’s not even the same behaviors that are the most dominant part of what’s keeping us stuck. Don’t get me started, please. How can we possibly expect change when we keep thinking the same tired, self-limiting thoughts?  



Abraham has referred to these self-sabotaging thoughts  as “arguing for our own limitations.”  You can be pretty certain that any thought or statement that contains the words, “Yes, I really want to do that but I can’t because . . . .” is perpetuating being stuck.


When I catch myself thinking a thought like this, it’s tempting to thump myself over the head but I know that the better move is to appreciate the fact that I have noticed that I’m thinking those limiting thoughts and change gears.


I’m sure you’re familiar with the line, sometimes attributed to Einstein, that the definition of insanity is “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” He is also known for an even more magnificent quotation: “Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.”


When we think about how we are doing, where we are heading, what we expect in our day, or our week or our year, those thoughts are very often the same version of events that have been repeating themselves over and over and over and over. We don’t even realize that we are “arguing for our own limitations.”


We are thinking, “I’d really like to finally get my perfect home, my amazing refuge,” and in the same breath we are complaining about our current home. We’re cursing the cable company. We’re putting up with clutter and disorganization. We think that we’ll never get the funds we need. The vibe of those limiting thoughts or statements is definitely NOT equivalent to the vibe of our perfect home. In fact, those thoughts are certain to keep us stuck right where we are.  And, the cycle continues.


We are thinking that we’d really like to have a relationship with someone who is our soul mate and, at the same time, wallowing in the fact that we feel lonely. We’re not presenting ourselves in our best light, enjoying our independence, taking care of ourselves, and instead are following the same routine over and over again, with little expectation of running into that soul mate.


Well, if imagination is the preview of life’s coming attractions, and I know that it is, we need to start crafting our decisions, our words, our thoughts and actions as if we are that person in the future who has realized our dreams. It’s a matter of switching gears, not continuing to look back and justify, letting go of excuses for why we are where we are. We need to start being that person who we dream of being now.


How would that person think? What would they expect? What would they appreciate? How would they walk? How would they dress? How would they spend their free time? What would they eat? What kind of friends would they choose?


If the answers to those questions seems like a stretch from where you are, perhaps it will help to realize that the person who we dream of being, who is living the life we really want, is Who We Really Are. We have the opportunity in this lifetime to be that person. Anything less than that is based on an old vibration and limited expectations; it’s far less than Who We Really Are.


I’ve suggested to some coaching clients lately that they make a list of a few things they’ve always wanted to do but haven’t done, just for fun. And, of course, they need to try some of the things on the list. I’ve also suggested changing up their routine, doing something differently than the way they usually do it. The idea here is to shake up the patterns that are leading nowhere but here.  The results have been amazing!  Doing one thing differently, trying something new, leads to new and better things presenting themselves.  One client, who has been trying new things and loving it, found herself recently drinking a margarita with the person she had been hoping to be with for a very long time, and watching a Mariachi band, something she’s always wanted to do.  It wasn’t planned.  It wasn’t scripted.  It just happened.  The “coincidence” of stumbling upon a Mariachi band in New York City while doing errands and being with her favorite person was the result of raising her vibration generally by thinking of herself and what was possible for her in new and different ways.


So, I’m wondering if you could envision how someone who was living the life you really want would dress, eat, walk, spend their time, appreciate themselves? You could actually make your decisions from THAT PERSPECTIVE, no longer looking back.


Would that person have some new friends, try new foods, treat themselves better, have a bit more swag, wear more attractive clothes, eat at different places, refuse to tolerate bad treatment by others?  If you’re having trouble imagining yourself as this new version of yourself who is living just the way they want, try taking a walk.  After you’ve walked for a minute or so, start imagining and saying to yourself,  “It’s happening.  Yep, it’s happening just like I wanted.  I’m so proud of myself.  This feels amazing. I can’t wait to tell everyone I know.  This feels magical.  I almost can’t believe it’s happening.”  Keep that basic dialogue going for a few minutes and notice that your way of walking has changed.  It just will. There is the tentative, shoulders hunched sort of walk, where you’re feeling stuck, and then there is the confident, shoulders back, bold strides of the person who has created just what they want.  It’s a completely different energy. 





How could you choose differently, in your actions and in your thoughts about what is possible, that would be demonstrating to the Universe Who You Really Are? When you choose differently, better, expect more, the Universe has no choice but to deliver those things that are a match to that person. It’s Who You Really Are, so why not try being that person now and watch how your circumstances change to match your new energy.


I would expect things to change quickly, as leaving behind your old pattern of limitation is upgrading your energy field. Everything can improve. Everything.


I would love to hear some examples of small and large moves you could make that would change what you are receiving from the Universe. By the way, this really works. No kidding.




I’ve got ideas, as always! If you’d like to join me in changing things up you know you can find me at


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